There is an epidemic of people who do not feel adequate, who feel unaffirmed, and are starving for recognition. This could be boys or girls, men or women. Some of these types of people become mentally and emotionally unhinged under these circumstances.

People react in different ways as individuals. There also appears to be gender-based tendencies. I want women to take note, because often, women miss red flags. It makes it easier to miss alarms when our perspectives as women are based on our own desires, personalities and feminity.

We may not realize what some other people’s capabilities are, what they are going through. We can be caught off guard. When it comes to relationships, there are various potential dangers that women run into with their men.

They commonly become their men’s targets. One problem is the fact that there are men who are starving for respect and recognition. They often become very self-serving and develop obsessions. The obsessions are destructive idols.

What is the idol of so many people?

• This idol tends to have it’s roots in rejection and feelings of inferiority.

• It can cause people to crave the spotlight.

• It can lead to madness, causing people to slip into delusion.

• It tends to result in a grandiose sense of self.

• It causes people to steal, lie, cheat, covet. Some even kill.

• The lust for this idol has caused many people to have an unhealthy love of money.

• The obsession with this idol has caused people to become false teachers who twist the word of God to elevate themselves and support their agendas.

• This idol causes some people to become violent.

• People objectify, demean, and abuse others because of this idol.

• Some men assault women because of this idol.

I’m talking about the idol of power.

Different people behave in different ways, due to their power-obsessions. Plenty people have been known to lie, covet, cheat, steal, or even kill, for the sake of “power.” This is no real power, but a perverted perception and application of perceived power.

There is a difference between a man desiring respect in a healthy way, and him becoming obsessed with power and idolizing it. There is no need for a person to go crazy, become self-serving, delusional or become extreme to get respect.

Reality is, the respectful, respectable man is a respected man.

• Some men are insecure and are obsessed with power in their relationships with women.

• They dog their women to maintain the so-called upper hand.

• Some men who profess themselves as Christians are obsessed with power, and they misuse and abuse headship to control their wives.

• Women should be aware that men like this are not rare.

• Women should be very observant and alert about this before marriage, or even before becoming involved at all with men.

• Women need to understand that men like this are often either envious and or resentful of a woman’s success.

Thankfully, there are decent men out there. Sometimes, due to superficial reasons or personal preferences, women find themselves with mean-spirited, broken men who mistreat them.

These men are often the types to take extreme measures to feel powerful. For some men, feeling they have a lot of power is so important. Sadly, their perception of what power really is is very distorted.

• Sometimes, some men will assault women, hold women hostage and in strange barbaric situations, and kill them due to rage against women and the illusion of power it creates.

• Other men are abusive mentally, verbally, emotionally, or otherwise, to create and maintain an illusion of power.

• Some people who call themselves preachers lie and twist the Bible, or tell people what they want to hear, so they can maintain a position of power.

There are plenty men who are not obsessed with power, but men who are obsessed with it are common. One main reason for power-obsession is deep insecurity. Some men are very insecure and become very dangerous as a result of their insecurities. Women need to be more aware about this.

Never date a man because you feel sorry for him!

Sometimes, a woman may feel sorry for a man that is visibly insecure, not realizing the potential dangers there. She may feel that all he needs is love. In addition, some women are attracted to bad boys and mean-spirited men.

Women should be aware of the dangers of becoming involved with such men. For a woman involved with a man like this, it is likely she will be the target for him to exercise dominance and control over.

This is to maintain his “power” and stay afloat, so that he will not drown in feelings of inadequacy. For this type of man, his insecurities are not innocent insecurities where he just needs to be reassured by his loving woman. No, he is mean, angry, often violent.

• Oh yes, and often, these types of men tend to be very charming and engaging.

• They are gifted with smooth, convincing words, and lavish women with gifts in the beginning, as bait.

• Their conditions are tied to their backgrounds/childhoods.

• Is your man a powermonger? Is your intuition speaking to you?

• Does your man have any of the symptoms discussed in this post?

Set healthy boundaries.

If so, he may not be a lost cause or hopeless. It is paramount that a woman makes it clear early on that she will not be mistreated. Sometimes, all a man needs to know is that a woman is not going to put up with it. Of course, he still needs to take it upon himself to get help and healing.

He may change his tune after testing his woman and failing the test. Other men will need to be left. It is up to a woman to use prayer, wisdom, and discernment to determine the best and safest thing to do.

When it comes to real power, that belongs to God. It is a divine power. It is not corrupt; it is good. “God hath spoken once; twice have I heard this; that power belongeth unto God.” Psalms 62-11.

There is never an excuse for violence against the innocent. Idolatry pf power must be repented of. Deliverance must take place.

“Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.”

1 John 4: 7-8