First of all, there are many black people doing the right things and making a positive differences in their communities, as well as in society in general. This is wonderful to see. I thank God for it. This post is not to offend anybody, but it is to address major problems instead of deflecting and running from these problems.
This post is about accountability and the need for healing in black communities.
A major problem in black communities is the cyclic breakdown of black households. According to Kids Count Data Center and Finances Online Reviews, a reported whopping 64% of black households in America are single parent households.
This will not be a post making excuses, but I cover the topic with a heart of compassion. This is not a post simply to criticize the black community. We desperately need to see positive changes and healing. Yes, as individuals people can and should make positive changes.
The first step to a solution is recognizing first that there is a problem. It is also good for every individual to see what we can do to help others and to be the change that we want to see. One of the first parts of addressing a problem is calling it out in the first place. This is what I am doing. I believe it is good for us to examine ourselves and our communities.
There are many factors involved when it comes to the reasons why some of the black communities are crime and poverty-ridden. Some people just can’t do any better at this time. It is tragic.
I have witnessed much of what I’m speaking of. At the end of the post, I will also leave some published articles with facts on these matters.
We know that blacks went through slavery and had it so hard. There was much unfairness and brutality. I believe it has left generational impact on the black communities. It is tragic. God will right all wrongs. However, today, there is generally more opportunity than ever. Yet, there are still some inequities.
Life is about personal choices. What choices are we, our family members and friends within our communities making?
Around the nation, violence is on the increase. In many black communities around the nation, violence, as well as other issues seem to be compounded in an ongoing way. It is deeply troubling as I observe the crime riddling many black neighborhoods.
These are black neighborhoods near and far. They are local neighborhoods and far away black neighborhoods. Who is there to blame? Is it the system’s fault? Is it systemic racism? Is the government really keeping black fathers out of the households?
While there are absolutely certain levels of injustice, generally speaking, many blacks can blame no one else but themselves for a lot of the problems in the black communities.
Blacks who are involved in committing crimes have the power to change their own behaviors. Blacks who create dysfunctional home environments for their children have the power to make positive changes.
Those who are not raising their children correctly have the power to make positive changes. Absentee fathers or mothers can change the trajectory and choose to be positive and safe presences in their children’s lives.
I have also taken note that some black women are coming together, having public meetings and trying to cope with the violence. They are unifying to help their sons choose better routes. These gatherings are sometimes aired on the news.
I say to myself, okay this is great, but where are the fathers? Where are the black fathers? Where are the fathers in all of this? Absent black fathers…that is a major problem.
Often, black women are trying to carry things themselves. Most black mothers are single black mothers. Generation after generation of black boys are born in single mother environments with Mom trying her best to teach her sons how to be men, if she’s a good mother.
If possible, it is important for her to find a positive man of integrity to mentor her son, even if her son’s father will not be involved, for whatever reason. Some mothers allow the streets to raise their sons while they run around with different men, or simply focus on working and other things.
It is a shame. Many black boys continue to join gangs, because they are without training, without discipline, and are looking for family and belonging. In particular, they need to connect with positive, strong, male role models. This is so important!
Well, sometimes Satan provides counterfeit famiies for them when they find and join gangs. They look up to the gang leaders. They are devoted to the gang. In the neighborhoods, drive-by shootings continue to happen. Some people are losing their lives over petty beefs and random bullets intended for someone else.
Rappers are often being shot and killed. This could be due to envy, personal beefs, as well as the glorified mindsets that many of the young black men have about gun violence.
There is negative influence from some of the rap music.
Vulgar rap music teaches the youth how to disrespect and degrade women, cherish materialism, and measure one’s worth by their assets. This music often teaches gun violence and glorifies violence in general. Young boys and men often strut around the neighborhoods with their pants hanging low.
Some of these men have no direction in life and sort of move purposelessly from day to day. Young ladies that are misguided help them to feel affirmed in what they are doing (or not doing) by dating them and having babies with them. Some young ladies are very misguided and believe that the rap / thug image is what is desirable in men.
Who is teaching these young black men and young black women? When parents do not teach their offspring correctly, the adversary will teach through other influences.
They are taught through toxic music, movies, and various social media platforms, in addition to other ways.
When parents do not train and teach their offspring correctly, society will teach them and often, the police end up having to handle them.
It is not the job of police. It is not the mayor’s job or community leaders jobs to raise the offspring of parents. That is the parents jobs. Yes, law enforcement and community leaders do their jobs to address delinquents and overall criminal problems.
But the parents should be present and do all they can to keep youth from becoming delinquent in the first place. The communities are dysfunctional largely because the dysfunction starts in the homes.
God help the black community and everyone else too. One thing women and girls can do is not to date, go to bed with, or marry thugs and any other kind of immature, irresponsible man who lacks integrity. Stop wrongly affirming men who lack integrity.
This is not criticizing. That is not what this is about. I aim to approach these problems from a proactive angle for those who need it. I have made many mistakes myself and wish I had been talked to more about these things. If someone has already had children with a thug or anyone else, then they can make the most of it. Absolutely!
Many women do wonderful jobs as single mothers. However, wouldn’t it be nice if girls and young women were mentored more properly and more proactively? Based on observations and speaking to different women, I know that many young women do not get the instructions they should be getting, in order to know how to safely navigate life and deal wisely with men and relationships.
In black communities this evil cycle has to be broken. Women of integrity should prefer men of integrity. If a follower of Jesus Christ, it is important that a woman does what is right in the sight of God. Mothers should be teaching and setting good examples for their daughters. It is good for girls and women to stop affirming the bad and offering themselves to immature men.
Many of the black men are lost, angry, confused, broken and donating their seed randomly. Girls and women are recipients. Plenty men are not seeking to be found. They are not seeking healing. Yet, they go around hooking up with all the women that they want, dating and even marrying some.
I have observed that many of the pastors do not even call out and rebuke the promiscuous, irresponsible, violent behavior of some of the black youths. Pastors should be good examples themselves.
It is important for the older men to in the spirit of love, rebuke bad behaviors in young men. How many are doing this? Some of the pastors will complain about the way women dress, complain about women’s hairstyles, complain about women preachers, and complain about many other things about women.
Some of these pastors are hooking up with women in the congregation or hooking up with men on the side. Plenty lord it over their congregations. Some are abusing boys and girls. But they don’t speak out much against degradation of women. They don’t talk much about and rebuke behavior of irresponsible sperm donors.
Some of the community pastors focus on topics of their personal preferences to speak on, instead of focusing on all issues, with major focus on the biggest, most impactful issues.
Many don’t seem to like to address any forms of abuse. Some don’t talk much about the violence from black men to black women, or vice versa. They won’t really highlight contempt of women and speak out against it. Many of them are not seeking to connect with and mentor the lost youth and are not holding each other accountable either.
When it comes to mentoring lost youth, what efforts I see are often from community leaders and mothers. This is very beneficial. Yet, young black men need to witness strong and positive loving fathers and husbands. They need their father’s presence in the home to demonstrate to them how to be responsible, hardworking men of integrity.
• Black children need to witness the positive union between their parents. This means where their father and mother love God, love each other, are faithful to each other and raise their children in love and the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
• Black children should be able to watch their fathers cultivate and maintain loving relationship with their mothers and vice versa.
• Black sons should be able to admire and follow their father’s righteous examples because their fathers have positve presences in the homes. A father teaches by demonstration and through verbal instruction.
• In order to be better prepared to be leaders in the future, sons should be able to learn by watching and listening to their fathers.
• Ideally, they would learn that financial provision is very important, but certainly not the biggest aspect of provision. Financial provision is in addition to the right nurture, structure, instruction, love, and overall presence in their household.
Generation to generation, in many black households, this ideal healthy home environment does not exist.
Again, mothers are best equipped to teach their daughters godly examples. This is in addition to instructing and demonstrating right examples to their sons also. However, boys also need a men of integrity around to learn from as well.
Jesus Christ is the only answer for the problems in the black community as well as in any other community.
When we get back to God’s way of doing things, this means the nuclear family thrives. When families are submitted to the will of God and fulfilling their roles accordingly, this is when we will see healing in the black communities. Until then, it continues to go downhill.
“If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”
2 Chronicles 7: 14
A change must come.
Here, Zanthia Oliver discusses crime and acknowledges the high rates of blacks killing blacks in her city of Wilmington, DE.
https://www.wdel.com/news/blacks-are-killing-blacks-police-id-woman-killed-in-wilmington-shooting-community-reacts-to-ongoing/article_6ee5f13a-9d3b-11eb-b2ec-ef12756a3ee2.htm
Black lives matter? Yes, indeed.
The New York Post candidly speaks about the high crime and homicide rates with numerous blacks mainly being the victims of other blacks: https://nypost.com/2021/02/06/these-black-lives-didnt-seem-to-matter-in-2020/
According to the Finances Online article “45 Single Parent Statistics you can’t ignore: 2022 gender, Race and Challenges” the majority of black households are single parent households: https://financesonline.com/single-parent-statistics/
Music influences people. Beginning and end of story. It matters what kind of music we listen to. Words are seed and have the power of life or death. There are problems in various genres of music.
Right now, I am focused on the black community and rap music. The fact that a lot of rap music (not all of it ) is filled with misogynistic, violent, and vulgar lyrics is known by many.
I don’t believe it is a coincidence that there is a genre called gangster rap. Despite the innocent or harmless beginnings of rap, I am concerned about what much of it has become today and how it is influencing people.
This interesting and older article describes some pitfalls of rap music and the effects it is having on some people. Much of rap music has regressed in certain ways since this article was written.
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