A root problem for girls and women is the fact that some have been brainwashed. They have been falsely indoctrinated by romance novels and fairy tales. Some women waste a lot of time with the wrong men, and stay in relationship traps because they are trying to make romance novels come to fruition in their own life.

It is important to note that what is read in the romance novels and heard about in the fairy tales is not real. Many women have already discovered this.

Wrong conditioning and consequent wrong thinking begins in childhood.

In the post Breaches In Conditioning Boys vs Girls, I talk about some ways children are trained with harmful ideologies and double standards. This results in dysfunctional relationships and broken families later in life. So many girls and women, including myself have had ideals based off sappy romance we read about, heard about, or watched on the screen.

Also, girls tend to learn early on to have lower standards for boys and men. In short, the “boys will be boys” mentality is learned early and programs women to have lower expectations and higher tolerance levels for men.

Lots of women have been further deceived by fairy tale fantasies.

At the same time, romance novels and fairy tales are also tools of deception. They are designed to cause girls and women to view men and relationships incorrectly. Consequently, many women have unrealistic expectations.

In addition to this, many girls and women have no idea the challenges they will actually be facing in their real life relationships. Furthermore, many women fall into idolatry of love and romance because of fairy tales.

The pickings are slim when it comes to finding the right man.

Unlike what romance novels depict, there is not a great abundance of chivalrous men waiting to sweep a woman off her feet, eager to love her right and love her tenderly. There are however, enough decent men out there to be found! One problem is a lack of young women being equipped with knowledge.

There is also a lack of patience among some women. Women sometimes do not know how to choose wisely or who to say yes to. Personal preferences can also get in the way and take priority over having the right standards. There are some men out there who will indeed make ideal spouses. It is safe to say that personal choices are a major contributor to life’s hardships.

• Everyone makes mistakes, and there are plenty lessons to be learned along the way. The problem is when women don’t learn from mistakes.

• Due to unrealistic expectations and ignorance, some women repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

• When women sober up from fantasies, this can help them be able to see and think more clearly to make wise and safe decisions.

• At this point, their judgment should no longer be clouded with fairy tales, and they will be able to be more discerning and see a lot more clearly.

Fact is, there is a lot of contempt from some men against women. This is a fact that not enough people seem to notice, care about or address.

Women under influence of fairy tales may miss important facts such as this, or wilfully ignore red flags. In the past, I also read romance novels. Consequently, I thought the romantic, chivalrous men in these tales were an accurate description of the men I would meet.

Interestingly enough however, I never met a man quite like what I read about in those books. Even still, to my enjoyment, some had a few similar characteristics of the storybook characters.

I didn’t want to buy romance novels as much as I wanted to read them. The main reason for this is because I only liked certain parts of them- The more inappropriate parts. They were pretty useless, except for a small section I was interested in. I would even read them in the grocery stores. I would quickly thumb through the book, trying to hurry and find the juiciest, most exciting details. Usually, about halfway into the novel, I would find what I was looking for!

Being so influenced by the romantic tales, and feeling captivated by them in relation to my own future prospects was a fantasy land. Only thing is, I thought it was real! Don’t get me wrong. I was pretty reserved and cautious in general. At the same time, I just thought that I would run into men who were like the ones I read about in the novels. I was really looking forward to it and expecting it.

Romance novels and fairy tales:

• Set girls and women up with false expectations.

• Blur and warp women’s perspectives and understanding of men and relationships.

• Blur or cancel out the line between reality and fantasy.

• Set women up for disappointment.

• Are tools of deception.

• Are destructive.

• Cause some women to be so dead-set on bringing the fairy tales to fruition, that they ignore the reality and dangers in their own real life relationships.

• Prep girls and women for relentless pursuit of the elusive love they observed and read about in the tales.

• Influence girls and women to idolize men, love, relationships, and marriage.

Some women end up being more in love with the idea of love than the reality of it.

Being deluded by romance novels and fairy tales is a dangerous place to be. Often, it later leads to bad, unsafe choices, disillusionment, consequent divorce, and or further pursuit of fantasy love. Some women are influenced by fairy tales for much of their life.

My prayer is for deliverance, and a sobering up for women who have been, or continue to be deceived by destructive tools.
I pray that women are able to turn from idols to serve and seek God Almighty, who is our source to turn to for every need and desire that we have.

Fortunately, I have learned along the way that I am to keep God first, pray, be content and be thankful-no matter what.

“Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” -Phillipians 4: 6-7.

My heart should also be pure and I need to have the right motives when I pray.

“Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not. Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.” James 4: 2-3.

Finally, I believe that if women can just keep it real, we will do fine. When Christian women honor God first as top priority and put our trust in Him, we won’t be led astray. A woman is so much better off with a spouse who is God’s best for her- no matter how long she has to wait to meet him. God’s timing is always right.