The types of women who are known as “pick me” women are contributing to the deficit of men who are marriage material or even ideal for a serious relationship. I have witnessed these types of women numerous times. I believe “pick me” syndrome is a form of self-hatred and a form of idolatry- idolatry of men.

It is important to note that pick me women are not those who simply hold themselves and other women accountable. Women are accountable for what we do. The problem is the overall slandering and denigration of the female gender.

I don’t necessarily like the terms “pick me” women [1] or “pickmeishas.” [2]. Regardless of the pick me and pickmeisha slang labels given to certain types of women, the definitions for the labels describing these women are quite accurate.

Pick me types of women are hurting themselves and other women. Here is why:

• Pick me women throw other women under the bus. They slander other women for male approval. I have unfortunately observed this and I find it vexing.

• Pick me women try to prove themselves as being different and more special than other women. Instead, it is beneficial when women encourage, support and uplift each other.

• Pick me women instead, support and encourage the hostility of certain men toward women in general. They help reinforce those men’s contempt of women.

• Pick me women often have low standards, few expectations for, and high tolerance for men misbehaving in general.

• Pick me women are desperate, which means they are very vulnerable.

• Pick me women reinforce and reward bad behaviors in men. They tend to attract predators who capitalize on their desperation.

• Pick me women don’t know their worth.

• Because of pick me women, the deficit that exists when it comes to men of integrity increases.

After all, if a man lacks integrity, why would he go after the woman who has integrity and will hold him accountable? For immature men, pick me type women are a lot easier and more convenient to deal with.

Despite the animosity these types of women have for other women, and despite the troubles that they cause for both themselves and other women, these women need compassion and prayer.

A prayer for all girls and women who do not know their worth:

Heavenly Father,

I pray that you will help each girl and woman to know and understand how valuable they are in Your sight.

Help them to know their worth. To understand and accept that no one and nothing has the ability to give them worth or take their worth away. Because you have already given them their worth.

Help them to understand that men do not validate them. Help them to be strong enough not to accept mistreatment in their relationships. Your word says in Ephesians 5: 25-29 that a man is to love and cherish his wife. And she is to love and respect him

( Titus 2: 4; Ephesians 5: 33).

Help women come into right relationship with You and receive your love for them. Help them to forgive women who have offended them. Help them to love themselves. When they love themselves sufficiently, they will not be accepting of hateful treatment in their relationships

Help them to love fellow women and girls. I pray that Your will be done in ladies, in that they fulfill the two great commandments; to rightfully love You with all their hearts souls, minds and strength. And love their neighbors, including men, women and children, as themselves. In Jesus name. Amen.

“Pick me” and “Pickmeisha” defined:

[1] https://en.m.wiktionary.org/wiki/pick-me_girl

[2]https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Pickmeisha